Vatican II Peritus Fr. Yves Congar Urinated on The Holy Office Twice. Made a Cardinal by JPII.

Meanwhile Mike Lewis defends women priests and apple juice baptisms as a deaconess/ synodality fan is made the first female catechist under Leo.

Some stories don’t need embellishment. They only require the courage to look squarely at the absurdity and say aloud what everyone else is too afraid to admit. Today, we are asked to believe that a man who urinated on the Holy Office not once, but twice, deliberately, proudly, and with contempt, was a prophet of aggiornamento, a hero of dialogue, and a theological saint of the New Pentecost.

And if you raise your eyebrows at this, don’t worry, Gregory DiPippo of New Liturgical Movement is here to assure you it was just a harmless bit of public drunkenness. Nothing to get upset about. Stop being rash. You’ll make lovers of the TLM look bad.

Congar’s Golden Contribution to Vatican II

Let us review what Novus Ordo Watch has uncovered, using Congar’s own diaries, no less. In 1946, and again in 1954, Yves Congar, the French Dominican peritus of Vatican II, deliberately urinated on the headquarters of the Holy Office. Not by accident or ignorance, but with full knowledge of the building’s identity and in defiant contempt of its mission.

The Holy Office, whose job it was to safeguard Catholic doctrine, was labeled by Congar as “Gestapo.” In his own words, he “paid his compliments” to the building, a euphemism his editor explains was literally scrawled in his own hand to mean: I pissed on the entrance.

Still, Gregory DiPippo, for reasons known only to the fragile psychology of post-Summorum trad diplomacy, rushed to defend Congar after I posted Novus Ordo Watch’s first article on the topic on Facebook a while ago. First, DiPippo postulated maybe Congar was just tipsy and didn’t know where he was. Then, when challenged, he clarified that he wasn’t defending Congar, only attacking Novus Ordo Watch for suggesting the act might have been intentional, which, again, it was. Twice.

You see, nothing brings credibility to the traditional movement like excusing modernists for sacrilegious acts against the building where Cardinal Ottaviani worked, while accusing faithful Catholics of “rash judgment” for caring.

What DiPippo doesn’t grasp is this: we don’t expect modernists to behave with reverence. We expect Catholics to say it’s wrong when they don’t.

But now that the primary sources have surfaced, now that Congar himself admits it in ink, will DiPippo offer an apology to those he scolded for believing what was, in fact, true? Don’t count on it. In the Vatican II church, truth is always subordinate to tone.

From Public Urination to the College of Cardinals

Finally, let us not forget the punchline to this entire grotesque joke: Yves Congar, the man who urinated on the Holy Office not once, but twice, and compared it to the Gestapo, was raised to the rank of cardinal by none other than John Paul II in 1994.

That’s right. While faithful priests were being sidelined for clinging to orthodoxy, this vulgar, modernist agitator was given the red hat. A man who quite literally desecrated the Vatican was rewarded with one of its highest honors. If that doesn’t tell you everything you need to know about the postconciliar regime, nothing will.

The Church of Mike Lewis: Womynpriests and Welch’s

While Congar was desecrating the physical walls of orthodoxy, another Vatican II disciple is desecrating the theological walls today, with a smile.

Mike Lewis, editor of Where Peter Is, offered his latest take on magisterial authority via social media: if a pope permits something, anything, it is Church teaching. Even if that thing is women priests. Even if it contradicts infallible dogma. Even if it’s heresy.

To Lewis, the papacy is a magic wand. Not a sacred office instituted to guard Tradition, but a kind of theological vending machine.

When reminded that the priesthood is divinely instituted and cannot be changed by any pope, Lewis doubled down. “The pope is the visible source of unity,” he explained, “and if you don’t believe that, then you don’t trust Christ’s promises to the Church.”

Apparently, trusting Christ now means female ordinations and whatever novel doctrine the next pontiff dreams up at breakfast. As one Catholic pointed out, sacraments were instituted by Christ, not assembled on-the-fly like IKEA furniture by a rotating committee of Synod deacons and Dominican bloggers.

This Catholic presented Lewis with the example of a hypothetical pope approving the use of apple juice for baptism, pointing out correctly that it would be invalid and would cause a schism.

Lewis’s reply? Apple juice is 88% water, so what’s the big deal?

This is the kind of argument that passes for theology in the Church of Vatican II. That’s what happens when you flatten the Deposit of Faith into a “thought experiment.”

Catechists with PhDs and the New Female Magisterium

Meanwhile, in Florence, we now have a woman formally installed as a diocesan theologian and catechist “in the name of the Church.” Serena Noceti, a laywoman whose résumé reads like a Vatican II Wikipedia page, is celebrated as the first woman to exercise the “charism of teaching theology” officially recognized as ecclesial ministry. Not “tolerated.” Not “permitted.” But sacramentally installed, per the Rite.

She will not just lecture schoolchildren. Noceti will serve as a theologian to the diocese, working alongside bishops and priests. We are told it is “a real co-responsibility for the Church’s mission.”

A woman in a magisterial role. In formal ministry. Teaching bishops. In persona Synodi.

Simona Segoloni, president of the Coordination of Italian Women Theologians, left no doubt about what’s happening: this isn’t just a nod to past service or a polite thank-you to a longtime catechist. No, according to Segoloni, the Church now needs to be taught by a woman. Her exact words: “the recognition of the Church’s need to be taught and, importantly, to be taught by a woman.” Not tolerated. Not accommodated. Needed. And so, in full view of the Cathedral of Florence, with episcopal approval and under the watchful silence of Leo XIV, Serena Noceti was formally installed as an official diocesan theologian, charged with teaching in the name of the Church.

This is not merely a woman teaching theology in a classroom. It is a woman being given public authority to shape doctrine within the diocesan structure, in formal co-responsibility with bishops and clergy. That is precisely what St. Paul forbade when he wrote, “I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to have authority over a man, but to be in silence” (1 Tim. 2:12). The tradition has never understood this as prohibiting all teaching by women: mothers, saints, and female religious have always taught children and other women. What the Church has consistently rejected is women teaching adult men in the public, ecclesiastical forum, with magisterial weight. That’s what’s happening here. And it’s not being done in spite of the apostolic tradition, it’s being done in defiance of it.

No wonder she co-authored Deaconesses: What Ministry for What Church? and helps lead 27 booklets implementing synodality worldwide. This is the inversion of hierarchy in real time, under the full approval of Pope Leo XIV’s hand-picked bishops.

Even if you still believe the New Mass is valid and the pope is pope, how much longer can you ignore that this is a different church?

Bah. Zip. Stretch. Now Preach the Word of God.

And then there’s the Preaching Boot Camp.

If you were hoping that priests would be taught the Fathers, Sacred Scripture, and the theology of St. Thomas so they could preach the Word of God with clarity, prepare to be disappointed.

Instead, diocesan priests were taught how to bah and zip in a circle like drama students at The Catholic University of America, led by a voice coach from the Baltimore Shakespeare Company. There were vocal warmups, jaw massages, acting exercises, and “relaxation techniques” to help them connect with their truest selves.

Their “truest selves,” it seems, were being tragically stifled by years of clerical formation and the weight of apostolic preaching. Thank God for improv games and chest vibrations.

Nothing says the new evangelization quite like priests in khakis being scolded by a voice coach: “Pretend you’re in church!”

Well, madam, they are.

But what exactly are they preparing to preach? The Gospel? Or the Synodal synthesis of climate justice, female theologians, and Congar’s ghost peeing triumphantly on the last shreds of Tradition?

Conclusion: We Are Not the Weird Ones

We are often told that anyone who dares question the post-Vatican II revolution are eccentric, schismatic, radical.

But ask yourself: who is really insane here?

• The people who think the priesthood is unchangeable? Or the people who think apple juice baptisms might be valid?

• The people scandalized by a modernist theologian urinating on the Holy Office? Or the ones who say, “Meh, maybe he was drunk. No big deal”?

• The Catholics who believe teaching authority belongs to the bishops and priests? Or the ones who give women formal ecclesial ministries to shape doctrine?

• The priests who preach like saints? Or the ones who are taught to bah and zip by a theater coach while learning to be their “truest selves”?

The only thing more scandalous than these stories is the silence of those who know better and say nothing.

If you want the Latin Mass without the Revolution, you are not welcome in their Church.

But maybe that’s the point.